4 Ways to Build your Confidence


Re-post from January 2013

Confidence is an essential leadership characteristic. I have found having and building confidence is an inward job while the results are primarily outwardly shown. This is because confidence is defined as “belief in oneself and one’s powers or abilities.” It starts with self-leadership and the ability to consider ourselves winners, valuable, honorable, and worthy. To increase in success and influence requires having and building our confidence level. I have found these 4 practical ways we can build our confidence:

1. Guard your words and thoughts-

Our words and thoughts can positively or negatively impact our confidence. This is because we will become what we consistently think about. James Allen said, “Good thoughts bear good fruit, bad thoughts bear bad fruit.” Determine to speak and think about yourself and the different seasons of life in a good and optimistic way. Guard and manage your thoughts so they build your confidence.

2. Focus on giftedness and passions-

A leader’s competence and confidence significantly rises when they are working in areas of giftedness and passions. If you’re not able to work in those areas at your job, I suggest finding a different job or concentrating on those areas outside of your day job. The more we are able to work in areas of giftedness and passions the more our confidence will grow.

3. Take action-

Taking steps to move outside our comfort zone and through our fears can build confidence. After putting it off for a long time, I recently started attending Toastmasters. One of my desires and near future goals is to begin my pubic speaking career. I had not spoken to an audience in several years and giving my first speech at Toastmasters boosted my confidence level. This only happened because I moved out of my comfort zone and started to take action. Taking action can also build your confidence level.

4. Grow yourself-

I have learned personal growth and development leads to an increase of confidence. The next time your are lacking confidence consider reading a motivational book, listening to an inspiring speech, or spending time with mentors. The knowledge and insights you gain will increase both your skills and confidence.

Question: How do you build and maintain your courage?

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

  • Just jumping through the things I fear can indeed helps to build my confidence.

    Although I still struggle with confidence, but I try to grow them bit by bit everyday through exposure to more and more things I fear.

    • I think growing it daily is key:) It allows us to maintain our courage and confidence. Thank you for adding to the post.

      Oh, by the way. Every time I go to your site it takes me to your ebook/subscription page but can’t find your blog. What is your blog URL.

  • I like the list and you’re action, Dan. That’s the key I think. It didn’t hit me the first time I read this, but I think one of the sure fire ways to get confidence is to work harder than everybody in your world. The results will come, but just knowing that you can push yourself is a huge confidence builder. You have a way of making me use my head, Dan!

    • Great points Floyd! Persevering through until we get the results we want is key. Thank you for sharing.

  • Great post Dan. I think that for me the number one thing that builds confidence in me is the acknowledgement that God has a plan for my life and I just need to walk it out. Not by my strength but His is a huge relief and allows me to walk with much more boldness.

    • Amen bro! That brings so much confidence. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.

  • This reminder never gets old Dan because we are constantly a work in progress always striving to build confidence in all areas of our lives.

    • Thank you for reading and adding to the discussion:)

  • This post could very easily be turned into a Bible study and each point assigned at least one Scripture. Of course, the idea beneath the surface is that our confidence comes from God through the avenues you mention in the post. My husband and I were talking the other day about how he was over-confident when we first married and I was under-confident and how we have almost met in the middle after 21 years of marriage. Interesting how God uses others to balance us, isn’t it?

    • That’s very interesting, it’s amazing how God joins a couple, making each person stronger in the process. Thank you for being open to sharing from your life.

  • Thanks for re-posting this. It’s a great message.
    One thing I must continually do is remind myself that I am not my own. I belong to Christ. Who I am is found in who He created me to be. I also must remember that He is greater than satan, so any fear I have is pointless because God is for me and He’s fighting my battles. That gives me purpose and courage.

    • Glad you enjoyed it:)

      Amen, God gives us everything we need, including confidence. Thank you for sharing.

  • Hey Dan,

    Cool to hear that you joined Toastmasters. I’ve been there for 1 year and 2 months now. It has pretty much eliminated my fear of speaking. What do you think about it so far?

    • Hello Ludvig,

      I went for several months and presented a couple different times. However, my schedule shifted so was not able to attend any more. I need to find one that works with my new schedule. Have you done all of the presentations yet?

  • It was good thing and great now :)

  • A good timeless post. Taking action is key for me.

    • Yes, that’s one of the most important ones. Thank you for reading and commenting.

  • Appreciate the post, Dan. Something I have been doing more lately is reading great stories of (for lack of a better word) adventure. I’m re-reading “Into Thin Air” by Jon Krakauer, and have several WWII books in the queue. I am really inspired by the heroism of others. Plus, a well-written book is just a blast to read.

    • Reading a broad range of books can bring so many benefits. Thank you for taking the time to share.

      • You have almost got me convinced to try out Audible.com.

        • Ha, nice! You can do a trial and get your first book for free. You should at least try it:)

          • I may do that. $15/month for one audiobook seems kind of pricey, though. I guess it’s because I buy either used books or eBooks, and almost never pay $15 for a book. (Maybe I’m a cheapskate! lol)

            • Audiobook are typically more than paper books (even used) so it depends on if you prefer audio or reading and don’t mind paying a little more. Also, being a member you get 30 percent off any other book (Besides your monthly book), which can bring the price significantly down depending on the book. Let me know if you try a trial membership and if you like it or not:)

              • Thanks Dan, makes sense. There is definitely a certain logic to the fact that a book I actually listen to is more valuable than a paper book I purchase but never read. :) Is there any kind of affiliate program so that if I sign up through your link, you get a credit of some kind?

                • I use to be an affiliate but I’m not any longer. Thank you for being willing to go through me:)

  • Dan,

    Taking action is key. We can plan and scheme but nothing’s going to happen until we make it happen. It’s uncomfortable at first because fear works to keep us safe and in the comfort zone. The more you step up, the more confidence you gain, and the more you learn. Congratulations on making your Icebreaker speech. You can use the Toastmasters experience to hone your keynote and workshops as you grow as a speaker.

    • Hello Joe,

      Yes, action is essential! All great leaders have the ability to take action. Thank you:)

      Glad to see you comment here.

  • I resonate a lot with the third point, take action. What else is confidence except taking action and seeing what you’re capable of doing. Let me put it another way. Before you take action, all your planning takes place in your head. You may know what you want to do and have it all planned out, but it doesn’t do you any good there. It’s only when you take it out and take action on it that you can actually build confidence. It’s when you’ve actually done something when you can feel confident about it.

    • Great addition points, the key it to plan and then take action (while not causing over planing or fear to hold us back from taking action). Thank you for adding your wisdom here.